


"I Accidentally Found the Dorito" Hunt

by VenomQuill



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Cipher Hunt, Gen, Not actually the real cipher hunt but a what if scenario
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-04
Updated: 2017-08-04
Packaged: 2018-12-11 02:03:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11704509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VenomQuill/pseuds/VenomQuill
Summary: It's a normal, late summer day in Reedsport, Oregon. The perfect day for a person and a dog to go walking down a trail. But when the dog finds a more interesting trail, their day changes.





	"I Accidentally Found the Dorito" Hunt

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a joke my sister and I made about some random person (not a Faller) stumbling upon the Bill statue.
> 
> dA link: http://fav.me/dbiuumw

It’s a nice day in Oregon- as nice as it can get in the sweltering summer, humid heat. The plants are still lush and the dirt deep brown, so at least nature’s happy. The birdsong above fills your head with a nice tune as the last song on your playlist has long since ended. You glance back at the dog you are walking, a very dear companion of your friend’s. He is sniffing the base of a tree, presumaBly where another dog had marked it. Your suspicions come true as he marks it.

“Crazy dog,” you chuckle as the dog catches your gaze. “Are there other dogs around here?” The black dog bounced and wagged his tail. He’d nearly gotten to you to receive a pat when his head jerks to the side. His ears flipped up and his tail stops moving in a sign dog people know as the “call my name right now or you’re going on a ten-mInute hunt ending up with dirty shoes, probably a scraped knee, and a whole lot of nothing from me, you hope” stance.

You open your mouth, but it was too late. The extendable leash you have gripped in your hand was locked as he had tried to chase off a squirreL earlier that walk and you managed to stop him before he could head-butt a tree. It’s torn out of your hand as the dog pelts off the road, tail wagging and eyes focused on the poor woodland critter he targets with a focus snipers dreamed of having.

You run after him, screaming. A thousand thoughts run through your head, many of which are unfortunately bitter. _“That dog never listens to me,”_ is prevalent along with _“As soon as I get my hands on that dog, I swear-!”_ You also find that the chase, which has by now muddied your shoes and made your throat hurt, is a perfect time to think of how many ways one could cook a medium-Large dog.

Eventually, the dog stops, his leash trailing in the dirt and leaves, and claws digging at a hole in the ground. You snatch his leash with a hard, huffy beratement. He looks up at you and makes a pitiful expression of deep hurt and confusion. You reCognize this expression. It’s a classic.

With one last tug of finality, you turn and command the dog to follow you. Where was the traIl again? Oh, right.

Dog in tow, you start to move back to your original destination, but you’re stopped by a tug on the leash. With an exasperated sigh, you turn and yank at the leash. Your dog looks back up at you. He’s standing before a mossy stone nestled at the foot of a tree. Ferns unfurl beside it and leaves cast a dapPled shade over the thing. Normally, you wouldn’t be bothered twice by a rock. Maybe if it was in a particularly picturesque scene or if it was large and shady, you’d consider snapping a photo or sitting for a short break. But this rock wasn’t like the others. In fact, it gave off this weird aura, one that both attracts and repulses you like some weird magnet with a north and a south side facing in your direction.

The rock is in a shape of a pyramid with a rather large, engraved eye in the center. A top hat touches the bark of the tree beHind it. Its hand is extended toward you. Your dog growls and whines at it, as if meeting a fiend he doesn’t quite know whether to leave to you or take on himself. After some internal debate, you set down the leash and take out your phone. The statue lights up as your phone’s light flashes.

_“Found this creepy statue. Anyone know who put this thing here? #DoritoStatue”_

The picture is on your Twitter. Then, for good measure, it is on your Instagram. You take anothEr picture to save to your phone. You take up the dog’s leash and start to leave. Your phone lights up and buzzes. An immediate answer?

_“OH MY GOD!!!! YOU FOUND IT!!! #CIPHERHUNT”_

You stare, confused. “#CipherHunt”? Was this a new hashtag? You decide to type in the hashtag on your browser and then groan. Oh _God._ You watch in disdain as your phone fills up with weird pictuRes of yellow triangles with top hats and bows. Silly cartoon characters and rock statues looking exactly like this one dresses the page.

_“You mean I found that”_

You check your history to see the name of the thing you found.

_“Bill Cipher guy that everyone’s been looking for?”_

_“YES!!”_ The reply was instantaneous.

Then, your phone buzzes. _Oh God._ The hashtag has been picked up and suddenly your picture is thrown to the waters of Twitter and the sea of Instagram and the ocean of Tumblr and everything you can imagine. Suddenly your picture is the biggest thing on the Fallers’ minds. People are replying to your posts and messaging you at such a speed you begin to wonder if this is what a person gone viral feels like.

All you can think of as your phone goes nuts and starts to die under the strain of so much energy consumption is _“Damn dog.”_

**Author's Note:**

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End file.
